Me: Last night my husband fell asleep and the pillow smushed his face a little and I saw what our baby would look like and I thought it was cute for like 0.5 seconds.
If I had a baby I’d constantly be texting you like, “How do I know if my baby is breathing normally??” Then 3 seconds later I’d text you like, “Oh nevermind. He’s breathing.”
I’d say like, “What is diaper cream for?”
And, “How do you put a diaper on a baby?”
Maybe you could draw a venn diagram.
Pellets from the Universe 